I Am a Tweeting Twit

Remember,voters don't vote their economic interests, they vote on who doesn't hate America, as the TV tells them.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  3h
Remember, voters do vote their economic interests, they vote on who doesn't hate America, as the TV tells them.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  3h
Ds. also believe in patriotism, except we all know their leader is a Muslim socialist who flies the flag of that foreign nation Hawaii.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  3h
In this era of the great wealth gap, who are the voters selecting the party of the wealthy, the Republicans? Rs. have money and patriotism.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  3h
Stats. give Rs. 99% chance of continuing control of House. Chances of Obama programs getting through: only slightly better
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  3h
The last time a Dem. President had a Supreme Court nominees approved by a Republican Senate was 1895. If Rs take Senate they may take the SC
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 20
Remember, Senator Blumenethal, you criticize train safety, we have trains that will take issue with that,
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 20
If you thought you saw a giant rabbit today, you are either a kid celebrating Easter or an adult too much celebrating 4/20,
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 20
"Great, I've been dead for two days, and now I got to push some giant rock."
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 19
Chelsea Clinton's baby already has a 74% positive rating.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 18
I've seen a lot of the great bands. The young can still see some of them, if they only knew who they are.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 18
What nice neighbors! They are making sure the arrested man's stuff is OK by carrying it out to their apartments.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 18
"Yes, son, that man is going to prison." "But, mommy, he sold the good stuff."
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 18
I tell you, this place has gone downhill since Angelina Jolie moved out.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 18
Anyone looking for an apartment to rent?
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 18
If you are on probation and yelling "you can't drug test me, I know my rights", you don't know your rights.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 18
The "it's must have been there when I moved in" argument doesn't work if it is sitting on your living room table.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 18
When is it time to get a new front door? After you refuse to let in your probation officer.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 18
For tonight's entertainment, we have the classic neighbor refusing to open the door for the probation officer argument.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 18
Of course, reality shows in Ireland, I hear, are fantastic and pay everyone union wages. Right? Just so long as they show @LadyGrew
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 18
Now that I have done a reality show, I may despise myself.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 18
My reality was I was on a reality show filmed a year ago and I forgot I was on it until someone said they saw it. Reality is too confusing.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 18
@thebobbieoliver If they cut the tags off underwear in pornos, then after shoots, the producers can't return them to the stores.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 17
The new thing in TV is to kill a character and then show the character isn't dead. I loved this concept back when it was called soap opera.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 17
Congratulations to Chelsea Clinton, who is now pregnant with our future President.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 17
My reaction to Mickey Rooney's estate valued at $18,000? The guy was loaded, man.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 17
You do realize that had President Clinton's secret service agent shot Mr. Met to death, Hillary would never have been elected NY Senator.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 17
The Secret Service agent who threatened to shoot Mr. Met to death must have been a Phillies fan.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 17
Oh, now I understand. He had eight wives, but not at the same time.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 17
I wish a rival studio head would spread a rumor about me in hopes of deflating my new contract. Best rumor I get is I burn the fries.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 17
If you get large facial tattoos, you really should avoid becoming a criminal,
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 15
My late wife's gynecologist just had her license suspended for not cleaning medical instruments between patients. We're a close knit town.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 15
For these who believe the world ends tonight, get a good rest and see you in the morning.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 15
Looked out my window to see the blood red moon yet I mistook it for my neighbor spanking herself.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 15
If you go to shoot Jews and you accidentally shoot Christians, do they make you turn in your white sheet?
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 15
Saying a politician has "elective dysfunction" may only be funny just the first time.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 15
You may get a DUI sitting in an operable car. If you sit in an inoperable car, you avoid a DUI. Don't make car inoperable setting it on fire
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 13
I hear Coachella is popular. I did not realize there was so much interest in stage coaches.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 11
when you throw shoes at a politician, try to throw a matching pair in her size.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 11
I strongly suspect Chelsea Handler will not be named to take David Letterman's place.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 11
Why do so many gun advocates look like examples of why we need stronger gun control?
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 10
I like those who argue that Jesus did not exist, but if he did, he had a wife.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 10
@scottdylan Thank you for listing me. You now join the CIA, Interpol,and the Flat World Society in listing me.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 10
Learned I am on the "Here's Ross" gag see;. Gag, as in people gag when they see me.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 9
"2 Broke Girls" is a rap for the season. Here is the season ending surprise: Lady Sybil dies.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 9
@DaGunnysWife Thank you. I seldom make what anyone thinks is a good point, including when I sharped a pencil.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 9
My friend doesn't understand online learning. He enrolled in the University of Phoenix. He moved to Phoenix.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 8
The news Al Sharpton was an FBI informant somehow makes me lose respect for both.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 8
I always tell boys in Connecticut that if they work hard someday they will play as good as the girls.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 8
RIP Mickey Rooney. RIP Jon Locke. Too much sadness.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 6
Disney has started a remake of an old classic. Yet, it will be Clinton vs. Bush, this time Hillary versus Jeb instead of Bill vs. George.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 6
Remember, we need to keep taxes high in order to subsidize WalMart so their prices will be lower.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 5
@joshcantalope Thank you for favoring-ating a tweet. I is grateful.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 5
The crisis in Crimea just got real. McDonald's there shut down all their restaurants.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 5
Pakistan accuses 9 month old baby at rock throwing with attempted murder, Oh, and the baby shot Mr. Burns.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 4
But, dad, I don't want to be President. I want to be a…painter!
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 4
Well, off to work at Uncle Bubba's Seafood and Oyster House, and,...
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 4
The candidate who spends the most money wins 91% of the time. Seriously, we no longer live in a democracy.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 4
Politics is no longer a game played just by the rich; it is not a game for the super-rich.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 4
Only in America can a candidate give $1.7 million to his own campaign with little notice because his opponent used $10 million of his own.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 4
George W. Bush is planning a series of Putin paintings…all shirtless.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 3
I think Tina Fey could replace David Letterman, Oh, wait, what was I thinking? There is no women's bathroom on that floor.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 3
GOP leaders: cut everything in budget EXCEPT military. Win midterm elections claiming Obama soft on military. Seriously, you all buying it?
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 3
If you believe the Fort Hood shootings were caused by Obama but not guns, you probably watch Fox News.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 3
If y0u really believe that allowing the wealth to contribute even more money to candidates improves democracy, I have swampland to sell you.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 2
If you leave 4% on a $1,300 bar bill, you have too much money and not enough concern.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 1
So rats did not cause the bubonic plaque. Hug a rat today.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 1
I like the response to "English Only" by proposing Spanish as the official language. In a fluke, that bill passed. #AprilFoolsDay
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Apr 1
April as Poetry Month is really cools,If only it didn't begin on April Fools. #PoetryMonth
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 31
HALF of returning combat vets need psychological assistance. Don't say you favor cutting psych funding and then say you support veterans.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 31
Who's on first? No, seriously, the Mets want to know.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 31
Judge refuses to jail wealthy man because he wouldn't fare well in prison. Like all inmates are happily imprisoned?
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 31
Baseball passed competitive walking as the national pastime after doping scandal: walkers found illegally chewing coca leaves.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 31
No, seriously, John Wayne asked to be called "Duke". He'd beat me up for the last joke except for the fact that…he's dead.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 31
John Wayne hated his stage name "John Wayne". He instead preferred his closest friends to call him "Duchess".
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 31
Spike a rumor: Red Bull does not contain bull semen, Unless, of course you put it in there.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 30
We can't swing a dead cat without people looking at you strangely
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 29
#DescribeYourCrushIn3Words See mug shot.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 29
In Dodgers baseball, one learns how to hit the curveball during an earthquake.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 28
If people want to cancel a show for what a fictions character said that was taken out of context, why can't we cancel Fox News for real?
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 27
We need a word in the English language for when a company rewards an executive for skimming money from their lowest wage earners.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 26
Wow, a candidate passed a kidney stone in the middle of a 90 minute debate. Said pain was 10 of 10. Pain, though, was from being at a debate
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 26
New York Times is offered several online subscription services based on what sections you want. What if you just want the comics?
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 26
Why did Kim Jong-Un get his hair cut just like mine?
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 26
Voters from state getting the least Federal aide support programs going to states with the most need and voters who oppose the programs.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 26
Twitter stock value is sinking. They may have to cut back from 140 to 130 spaces.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 26
I hear Amsterdam has loverly tulip fields. I know that is where I would go in Amsterdam.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 26
Amelia Earhart has an official website. Wherever she is, she has computer access.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 26
CNN is now expanding its coverage on Amelia Earhart.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 26
@MonicaHesse Please tell Jimmy Carter "Leon" says hello.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 26
Everybody Poops, Except Martha Stewart #howtoruinachildrensbook
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 26
Heather Has Two Mommies and a Slave Boy Daddy #howtoruinachildrensbook
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 25
Soon will be the first Presidential primary that very well may determine the nomination: Who will win Sheldon Adelson's vote?
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 25
Remember, when you're Secret Service and you're protecting the President, just not to pass out drunk. It gives the KGB one more laugh.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 25
@nealon35 Thank you for the favorite. TMZ will look into your favoring patterns and do an expose.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 25
Ten, Nine, Eight is All the Counting I Was Taught At School #HowToRuinAChildrensBook
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 25
TMZ Presents The True Story of the Three Little Pigs #RuinAChildrensBook
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 25
Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See, After You've Eaten Me? #RuinAChildrensBook
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 25
Green Eggs and Spamalot #RuinAChildrensBook
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 25
Where the Wild Things Are Posing Naked for Cameras #RuinAChildrensBook
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 25
Waterrship Down by Korean Missile #RuinAChildrensBook
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 25
Winne the Everyone Poohs #RuinAChildrensBook
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 25
Charlotte's Webbed Feet #RuinAChildrensBook
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 25
State Senator who wants a Judge to approve sex for a woman getting a divorce: What Judge wants a phone call at 2 am?
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 25
In the remastered "Seinfeld" series, the characters Jerry Seinfeld, in season two, is killed off.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 24
There is a proposal to ban legislators accepting envelopes of cash. Suitcases of case, of course, are alright.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 23
Yeah, Josh Charles, go ahead and demand a hefty raise next season. What are they going to about it?
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 23
The Vatican's cocaine stash has been seized. Things are going to get crazy at the next Papal pronouncements.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 23
Today, England celebrates Lord Westchester Day, named in honor of the man who rounded up all the Irish snakes and sent them back to Ireland.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 23
Remember, March 23-30 is Russian American Month.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 23
@MonicaHesse Where I come from, sour milk from a tethered goat is revered.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 21
@ahalfslovak Thank you for the retweet. More members of Congress read my retweets than we watch them on C-SPAN;
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 21
I have got to stop looking at sales figures of my works and feeling sorry for the people buying them.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 20
Of course Harvard beat Cincinnati. This was this the College Bowl, right?
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 20
Mary-Kate Olsen states she just learned to use a hair brush last week. Next week she hopes to learn how to use a toothbrush.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 20
I don't know what happens when we die, and I mourn the death of anyone, yet hopefully Fred Phelps has now learned a lot and is a good soul.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 20
If you promise to picket an Amish funeral where I am and not show up, I will promise to picket your non-funeral and not show up.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 20
The Chicken from Hell was made extinct by the Sandersaurus from Kentucky.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 20
C-SPAN changed Congress. Now Members of Congress speak primarily to the cameras to be watched by imaginary viewers.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 20
The 1893 Panic that collapsed banks and railroads and drained the government of its gold created lower unemployment rates we've seen.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 20
C-SPAN is 35 years old. They will celebrate by giving out a present to their 100th all time viewer.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 18
The weird part about my newspaper being delivered underneath snow was it didn't snow.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 18
Schools banning things causing bullies to bully: So, it is the victim's fault they are bullied? As Teddy Roosevelt would say, "bully".
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 18
@geneweingarten Amtrak Connect does not permit access to this. Only Amtrak equates Physics to porn.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 17
Gravity waves in dark matter allow all atoms in known universe to shoot out faster than the speed of light. Got it. This creates a TV series
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 17
"Irish kiss me, I'm French".
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 17
I think I just qualified for a Barbie Girl Scout badge. I am not proud of this.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 17
I have got to stop telling women on airplanes that my name is Clauco,
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 17
Love watching the river turning green. Wait, I don't live in Chicago….
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 17
Edwin Edwards: No dead girl or live boy found in his bed. Seven women in his bed didn't stop him from being elected.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 17
No, that's not the green beer talking, that's an earthquake. Happy St. Patrick's Day, California!
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 16
Weird statistics: Either crime is increased among the young or it is reported more. Or the statistics are wrong. If right, why is this?
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 16
@BestTattoos_ Thank you for favoring a tattoo. I may have to have that tweet tattooed inside my lip.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 16
I must confess, before today, I never heard of an inner lip tattoo,
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 16
I wonder if the family of Fred Phelps will be upset if there are protesters at his funeral?
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 16
My condolences to friends and family of Wayne Knight whose fake death was reported on the Internet, including Facebook news.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 16
For those calling Christie the "front runner", CNN poll puts him tied for 6th. Rand Paul, now that's a frontrunner.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 16
First, #mcconelling now #Reaganing  Where does it stop? #WarrenHardinging ?
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 15
"Hunger Games" is filmed in Georgia, a place where running around the woods killing people in not something considered unusual.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 15
My views are the responsibility of Fox News. Feel free to sue them for all imagined damages.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 15
Humor is the mind processing two incongruent thoughts: like Ted Cruz and the truth.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 15
http://Washingtonpost.com  gets almost 19 million unique, and 2 ordinary, visitors a day. And none of them wipe their shoes off first.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 15
Today's the day people imagine they see snakes and then they drive them to an imaginary ocean where they swim to England.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 15
Is today Leftover Pi day?
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 14
I left my coat at Starbucks and accidentally instead grabbed some ugly fur thing. I tossed it.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 14
TV: We found where the suspect was hiding from a piece of dust. Reality: We have no idea where a big airplane is.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 14
i would re-brand the McConnell smiling ad with "Yakety Sax". #mcconelling
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 14
"Three's Company" starring Barack Obama, Joe Biden, and John Boehner, with Mitch McConnell as Mr. Roper. #mcconelling
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 14
"Justified": A U.S. Marshal attempts to clean up Kentucky starting with the senior Senator. #mcconnellling
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 14
"Two and a Half Men" starring Ashton Kutcher, Jon Cryer, and Mitch McConnell. #mcconelling
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 14
Anyone feel like joining me in some #mcconelling later on?
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 14
Taylor Swift broke up with me and stopped being one of my followers. I feel so sad. I feel like writing a song about it to cheer myself.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 14
@sutterink Great article with excellent points. Although I think Mrs. Google is mad at you.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 14
New study shows women get 30% of all speaking roles in Hollywood. Sorry, I just can't find a joke to form around that statistic,
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 14
OK, we agree not to go to war so long as neither side shoots down a plane. On second thought, make that two planes. (Does a drone count?)
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 13
@BestLyricsSwift Taylor Swift. Thank you for following me, I promise never to do anything to turn our relationship into song lyrics.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 13
We were so backwards, we could only get scared on Thursdays the 13th.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 13
How many members of Congress smoke pot? Judging solely on their behaviors: All of them.
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 13
Ever hear music and wonder, is this going to be "Sweet Home Alabama" or "Werewolves of London"?
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 Leon Tchaikovsky ‏@SexiestLyingWit  Mar 13
Older than you've ever been, younger than you'll ever be.