Parallel Parking is the Secret to Life

It is amazing what you can learn by observing. I saw a car with a license plate that read “God is my co-pilot” when I made a revealing theological discovery. God has no idea how to parallel park.

A poor guy was released from prison for 20 years and promised he would go straight. Unfortunately, he celebrated his release by going into a New York restaurant and lighting up a cigarette. Poor guy had never knew what hit him.

Flight attendants need to understand the mentality of crazy people. I saw a flight attendant trying to get a crazy guy to put on his seat belt by asking him “if you don’t put on your seat belt, you’ll go flying down the aisle at 800 miles an hour” You see, to this guy, that just about sounds like the most fun possible.

I like the idea of breathalyzers where one needs to blow into one before they may drive a car. I think we need one for Congress. They should breathe into a breathalyzer before they vote on bills.

What is the meaning of life? Why waste time searching for an answer to a question that can’t be answered. Life is. Although, if you add milk, it gets soggy.